Home alone today....so why do I feel so blue?

Dear Diary,
Tuesdays and Wednesdays I've been trying to spend time at my abode doing this or that. Most times I find myself moping and feeling down in the dumps and not much gets accomplished. The "Blues" hit me the minute I get in my car to leave Ed's house. sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yesterday as we were driving home from the campgrounds, I felt like I was on top of the world.....and now I'm feeling like I am at the bottom of it. :0(
I keep telling myself that I need some time to be away by myself ...and that's not working out. Having my things at two homes makes me wonder just where I belong. Not having EVERYTHING in one house makes me feel lost and confused. In neither house do I feel the comfort of belonging there. In Ed's arms, I know I belong with him, but where??? He tells me that I can make any change inside his house that I want to, but I can't bring myself to. Some of you reading this are probably saying, "what's her problem!" Damned if I know.

Last night around eight, I got a call from Jill telling me that earlier my daughter Cheryl had cut her left arm badly when it went through a window pane on her porch door. Indeed she did! In talking to her once she returned from getting stitches ( at least ten ) that she was miffed at her 30 year old (live at home son) and went to go out to cool off and in doing so she pushed her left hand through the window pane as she went to slam/push it open.  Muscle and all was exposed and she bled heavily. There is probably more to that story than was told to me. My gut tells me so.
When Cher called me to tell me she was home from the E.R.  around 9:30 she said she had spoken to Jill first and things didn't sound good at my house with Jill and Gil. She heard Jill say that one of them would be going. Hearing that...I took the phone off the hook. Either one gets themself in trouble, I'm not hearing about it until the next day. I'm going to bed. And I did, but sleep didn't come until after 11 p.m. Poor Ed was alseep when the call came at 9:30. I was watching the CMA Awards in bed beside him.
When I asked Jill tonight,  she said Gil had sworn at her and that was why she was upset. I'm sure I didn't get even a tenth of that story, but that's all she wanted to give up. My gut tells me that there was more to it. I asked her point blank if she was still drinking. Her answer, " nothing like I did a month back when I was in your bedroom drunk and you left me a note.
Of course, I have no way of knowing that for sure, as I haven't been home but a day here and there in the last month.
Anyway, whether it's one drink or ten drinks, it's still too much and I need to tell her that In as nicest way as possible ) as soon as I have a moment alone with her.

Tomorrow, Chrys is coming to the house to color my hair, frost Jill's and cut Gil's. My hair doesn't really look like it needs coloring and it's been at least eight weeks. :0) Next time I will make my appointment even longer off than this time, being that I only get a trim besides my color now.

Plans are in the making to go to Florida for the month of November again.  Jill's first beau that lived just up the street as a kid, is loaning us his house. He spends most, if not all of his time at his girlfriends these days and has always offered it to hubby and I in the ten or more years he has lived in NorthPort, but Ed has an invite too now. :0) Of course , Ed will leave more than enough money for the use of utilities. We had that offer last year too, but chose to pay my DIL Deb for the use of her double wide in a retirement village....which was veryyyyyyyyyyyy nice and very nice of her.
Before we head down to FL, we will go to Murfreesboro,TN and spend a few days with Ed's oldest daughter Debbie and her husband Steve.
IF, I don't sound thrilled about going....it's my Nature. Until I begin the journey, I will not be enthused. My Home is my comfort zone, such as it is. I shit you not!

Made a check out to the handyman that the neighbors have been having do repairs on their homes and have liked his workmanship.. So far a little over a grand...but I am delighted that my chimney is fixed and NO MORE will I not have hot water from my waterless tank in the basement because the ignition/igniter???  got soaked from rain water. I will be getting a storm door for some of those monies on the door where I have never had one and wished I did. :0)
My son Randy...is NOT SO HAPPY that I am paying someone else to do some work on my home as he could use those monies, but.... while he is a WORKER, he does not do everything I like done the way I want it to look. Always has to tweek this or that or upgrade this or that and I am not thankful when he does this. Yeah...I feel bad knowing my son can use money, but not bad enough this time.

Stopped on my way home at Kohls and bought a few summer items on sale ( end of year ) for FL trip.
That should have perked me up, but buying another size larger DIDN'T. Last year this time I was in a size 10. I can squeeze my ass into a 14, ( that's what I just bought), but if I don't smarten up...by November they will be too small. :0( That's a DOWNER! I shit you not!
Ed's gained about ten pounds and also isn't a Happy Camper about it.  Wish I could say that my weight gain in one year, has only been 10 pounds. I WISH!
Yesterday the 12th ( our First year anniversary, Ed took me to Essex for a Shrimp Plate. French fries, onion rings...To Die For.   We needed to walk the fifty miles or so home to work it off. ;0) The day we met he took me to a seafood place in another town for my favorite seafood (fried shrimp) and while it was good, this place makes it much better. I shit you not!

The Ex SIL from Hell, put a full length picture of himself on a billboard in his town advertizing HIS law firm and some of his prices. $3,500 for a divorce, $3000 for an OUI . Free Consultation. Shaking head here....................  THIS is the same SIL that took a full page color add out in the telephone book when he opened a heating and air conditioning business and wasn't paying child support. These things don't cost Hay. What an egotist!
I'd post it on Facebook, but...I don't want to chance giving him any business. Call me...BITTER!

It's going on ten P.M. Think I will hit the hay ( after last night ), I need it.

Didn't miss this meal either!   Taken at daughter Michelle's for college graduation cookout for grand daughter Theresa this month.

(((hugs)))

That's All Folks!